Grey hair like elephants pubes.

I was watching the telly last night and one of those adverts came on about anit-aging creams. You know the ones, they show a close up of a wrinkle, so close that it looks like the Grand Canyon, then they fill it will 'cream' which looks more like construction grade ciment. And, hey presto no more wrinkles! Well, I have tried them all - they don't work. Nothing in this world will make me look like the actress in the advert, who I know is at least 10 years older than me, but looks 20 years years younger.

Then there is the grey hair adverts. paste a bit of colour on your roots and after 10 mins you too can have lustrous, non-grey hair. Well, as a hairdresser with over 20 squillion years experience I know that after 10 mins, the grey hair will still be grey-ish and still be as coarse as the aforesaid elephants pube.

What is this ageing process all about anyway? Why is it that as we get older, we get more confident, more sure of ourselves (really, when does that happen?) and wiser, only to have our looks go down the pan (well in my case anyway). When I look at photos of me at 20, I was hanging out with a rock band, really slim in skin tight jeans and high heeled boots, wild hair and feeling great, only to have my mum say that I was putting on weight and my thighs were looking chunky! All through my late teens and early 20's when I was having a great time all I got was 'you've put on weight', or 'I saw so-and-so at the weekend, she said you had put on weight'. Apart from anything SO WHAT!!!!! Now at 44 minus 2 months I have most definitely put on weight and would give my eye teeth to look like I did at 20. But my 20's were full of being unsatisfied with my weight, being told I was a porker. although in todays term size 10/12 is a porker, and eating nothing but grapefruits for a fortnight at a time!

I have to say that I don't feel old enough to be my age. At my age my mum had 4 kids, I've got 4 cats, 6 chooks and an OH. I thought that at this age I was meant to feel 'grown up' and 'know what I was doing with my life'. I've got quite a good idea about the latter, but Dad still likes to throw a spanner in my thoughts every so often.

Still, try to stay positive. I live in a lovely rural area of France, in a house that is almost finished being renovated (when I can sit back at look at it all finished, we'll sell up and do it again), with a great OH, gorgeous cats and a kitten and funny chickens, got great friends around me, so who cares if I have 'put on weight'!